Aftermath
by Meg F
Summary: Dawn and Spike after the fifth season episode, 'The Body'.


Spoilers: First scene is set post-Blood Ties, second is post-The Body.  
  
  
  
Aftermath  
  
"Did it hurt when you died?" Dawn asked the question casually, scuffing a sneaker into the ground outside the crypt.  
  
Spike shrugged. He shook a cigarette out of the packet, and lit it. "Some, yeah," he said thoughtfully. "But you get over these things when you know you're gonna come back as the baddest thing since... since..."  
  
"Sliced bread?" she supplied automatically.  
  
He sighed.  
  
"Not that sliced bread is very bad," she giggled. "Though it does scare me a little. I mean, how do they get it in the bag so neatly?"  
  
He frowned, then studied her face. "Does B- does your mum know you're here? You'd better not stand too close or she'll smell smoke on you."  
  
"I was studying at a friend's place. This is on my way home." Dawn's voice hardened. "I don't have to tell her every little thing I do. Energy blobs don't need curfews." She smiled, reverting to bratty fourteen-year-old mode. "And it's - it's kinda fun to hang out with you."  
  
The glowing point of his cigarette in the darkness made trails on her retinas. She watched, fascinated. "I guess you don't need to worry about cancer, what with being dead and all," she remarked.  
  
"You could at least *pretend* to be scared of me, you know." Twin plumes of smoke issued from his nostrils.  
  
She shrugged playfully, and grinned.   
  
"Do you want me to tell you?" He raised his eyebrows, exasperated.  
  
She schooled her expression. "Yes, please."   
  
He spoke quietly, dreamily. "Dying was scary, Niblet. Ghastly. My entire body spasmed. I felt like my insides were gonna come out through my nose. The pain passed before long - well, it felt like forever, but it was quick - and then I was left with dizziness. I was weak. Floating in emptiness."  
  
Dawn gaped. "And then what happened?"  
  
The spell was broken. He frowned. "Well, Dru saved me, Junior Slayer. You know that part. I drank from her, and never felt weak again."  
  
"Except around my sister," she added.   
  
"Yeah." He sighed again.   
  
Dawn winced. "Sorry." She perked up. "Hey, do you have any corn chips?"  
  
"Knock yourself out, kid," he gestured inside.   
  
  
****  
  
A small, thin figure sat on the wall bordering the rooftop parking lot, hair tossing in the wind.  
  
His shoulders tensed as he saw her. He walked along the wall towards her, carefully making enough noise to alert her to his presence.   
  
She didn't turn. Her face was tear-stained. "Spike. Did she send you?"  
  
"Who, Niblet?"  
  
"Buffy."  
  
"No - I often hang out around here. Good place for a smoke."  
  
"You didn't follow me?"  
  
He lied deftly, "I'd never do something like that." And especially not because I want to keep you safe for your sister, he thought. "Though I wondered where you've been. You haven't come to see me for a couple of weeks."  
  
He peered over the edge. This was Sunnydale's biggest mall - four storeys of shopping madness - and it was a long way down. He took in her expression, and finally said it. "I hope you're not thinking of jumping, Niblet."  
  
She turned to him. "You don't know, do you?"  
  
"Know what?"  
  
"Mom. She, uh," she gulped, dragging the back of her hand across her eyes, "she's dead." She brought the tears under control quickly.   
  
He jolted forward, banging a knee painfully on the low wall. "What? What happened?"  
  
She said flatly, "A brain aneurysm or something. Instant. They say it didn't hurt."   
  
"Shit," he said without thinking. "I thought she was going to be all right."  
  
"Yeah, me too."  
  
He turned his back on the wall, leaning absently against it, and stared into the night sky. "She - she made me hot chocolate. We watched 'Passions'."  
  
"Not any more," Dawn's voice broke again. Spike shook himself, and turned back, putting an awkward arm around her. She flinched, then relaxed, allowing the gesture. "That's why I came here. I had to get out."  
  
"I don't think she would've wanted you to get out this way," he pointed out gently.   
  
"How do you know? She wasn't even my mother!" She pulled a clenched fist out of her pocket, and opened it to show a photo. She blinked at the crumpled piece of paper. "Me and her at McDonald's for my seventh birthday. But it didn't happen, did it. I wasn't there. It's all wrong." She shouted, "So why do I CARE?"   
  
"She was your mother, Dawn. She looked after you."  
  
"But only for the last few months."  
  
"So? She was the closest thing I've had to a mother in a long time, and I never even lived with her. Always treated me with respect." He laughed softly, "Even when she hit me with an axe."  
  
"Spike, it's not the same. I'm different. I was... made. Manufactured. I'm the... Key," she said with distaste. "I'm meant to do something. Being, being 'Dawn' has nothing to do with it."  
  
"You think the rest of us have control over that? I didn't ask to be born, Junior Slayer. I didn't ask to be made. I was meant to live a sad little life and die of something embarrassing, like syphilis. I'm not meant to be me, either."  
  
"But you fit in. You're normal."  
  
He chuckled. "I'm a vampire, about three times as old as your Mr Giles, with a chip in my head so I can't kill humans. Your sister is the Slayer. She hangs around with an ex-vengeance demon, two witches, a Watcher, and King of the Idiot-boys. That ain't normal. You fit in just fine."  
  
She was unconvinced. Tears rolled down her face unnoticed. She said drearily, "I don't even know how much time I have. How long before I have to be the Key. Before they take me and use me." She was motionless, looking down into the street. "I could really screw 'em up."   
  
How did this happen? How did I end up on top of a mall trying to persuade the Slayer's energy-blob sister not to off herself?!   
  
He tentatively touched her hair. He was surprised and pleased when she unconsciously leaned into the comforting gesture. He said quietly, "Don't let it define you, Niblet. Don't let that be all that you are."  
  
She sniffled. "What do you mean?"  
  
"You have a choice. You can do what you want. The rules can be changed. You don't have to be what they say you are." He was silent, thinking back to William the Poet. "No one said you can't be *Dawn*."  
  
"And what is 'Dawn'?" she asked helplessly.   
  
He sensed she was starting to crumble. Good, at least the Slayer has another reason not to kill me. "Whatever the hell you want." He took her arm, and tugged her lightly towards him. Towards safety. "Go home. Your sister needs you, kid. Whether or not she's really your sister."  
  
She obediently swung her legs back over the wall, and gave him a shy, tremulous smile. "I wasn't going to do it, you know," she told him.   
  
"I know." He put an arm around her shoulders as they started to walk off.   
  
"I was only looking."  
  
"I know. Drop by and see me sometime, okay?"  
  
"Okay."  



End file.
